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Here is where you discuss everything under the sun, just keep it clean.
by lammy » Fri Jul 27, 2007 5:54 pm
Jake rolled his eyes after they all left the kithen and let out a big sigh .
" Boy ... these kids really need some dissapline . " He laughed . " Now
what am I supposed to do with this mess ? " Jake looks around in the
kitchen and didn't know where or if to begin cleaning what his employees
had left behind . " Hey guys ! "
Tim was still in the shop . " What boss ? "
" I have invited Jim , if that is okay " , shouted Jake .
Tim threw his hand up . " Yeah boss ,that is fine ... no problem . "
Tim left the shop to join the others while they sat waiting for him in
Rolands car .
" Jim you can go now . Take the rest of the day off to get ready for
tonight " , says Jake raising his two dumbs up winking he then lets out a
snorts with his laughter . " Cause I know I have to get ready . "
Jim dropped everything and ran out the door leaving another
mess for Jake to clean up .
" Great " , exhaled Jake scratching his head . All Jake's employees had
now left the building and so Jake began thinking about what he would
wear on his trip . He turned the lights off in the shop and locked the
door . Jake headed towards a clothing store near his house called
" Lucky's Place " . On his way to the store his employees passed him by
in Rolands car .
Roland screams , " boss be ready by eight " . Then he laughs .
" Sure I will " , shouts Jake .
" What a loser " , says Ross laughing .
Roland honked and speeded away with all the gang in his car.
Jake arrived at the clothing store and fixed himself up before entering ;
he pulled up his pants till he couldn't pull them up anymore ; he adjusted
his eye wear and slicked his hair back . He entered the store .
Bah hum bug!!!!
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lammy
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by lammy » Sat Jul 28, 2007 6:11 pm
" Goodevening sir ... and how may I help you " , asked the lady behind
the front counter at " Lucky's Place " .
Jake looks around and sees nice pairs of socks he would like to take
home . " Yes . I am looking for a dress pant - I have a very hot date
tonight . " Laughs Jake snorting with his laughter . " Can you help me
with that problem " , adds Jake .
The lady looks at Jake up and down and begins laughing hysterically .
" Excuse me but did I make a funny ? " Jake scratched his head in
confusion .
The lady points to a man standing infront of a dressing room .
" He'll help you sir . " Grins the lady .
" Cool ! " Jake slowly walks towards the man . On his way there
he stared at all the nice looking socks that they had on display.
The man standing infront of the dressingroom began laughing as Jake
made his way to him . He waves to Jake . " I can help you you over
here sir ! "
" Yeah , yeah ... " Jake cleared his throat . " Ummm , I am looking to
purchase a good dress pant ... you see I have a hot date . "
The man places one hand on hip and starts moving the hips side
to side as he talked . " Well , you've come to the right person . " Grins
the man .
" Good . Well , what do you recomend I purchase for tonight ? "
The man puts a hand on his forhead and begins tapping his foot .
" I'm thinking ... I am thinking here - hmmm , I got it , come with me . "
Richard ( the man helping Jake at the clothing store ) grabs Jake by the
elbow and drags him to a shelf in the store . He starts bitting his nails
" You know what ? You need more than just a new wardrobe ... you need
a whole new make over . " Grins Richard .
Bah hum bug!!!!
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lammy
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by lammy » Sun Jul 29, 2007 3:35 am
" Oh brother , here we go . " Jake rolled his eyes at the man . " I don't
have time for your comments or your suggestions right now . Can you
please pick out a dress pant for me please ! "
Richard went from a grin to half a smile . " I see you are in a
hurry ... here , I think these will look good - I mean they look good to
begin with but they will make you look good " , says Richard grabbing a
pant from every shelf and tossing them at Jake .
Jake opened his eyes wide and to himself he says , " this guy thinks I
am rich or something ? " Laughs Jake .
" Here you go . I thought all of these might suit you well ... I mean help
you out . " Smiled Richard .
Jake looks at Richard and says , " please tell me all these pants are
on special ? "
Richard turns to Jake and laughs really loud . " Nope - I am afraid not ,
but you'll thank me ... the ladies are going to flock to you like flies on
crap ! " Laughs Richard again . He walks away throwing his hands up in
the air and whispering something to himself .
Jake slowly lowered his head bringing the pants to the front counter .
" How much is this ? "
The lady at the front counter grins sarcastically. " Umm , I don't think
you can afford all these . " She laughs .
" I need only one ... that guy thought I needed more than one . "
Chuckled Jake nervously .
The lady at the front desk stuck a pencil in her mouth then says ,
" I think he has a point " . She laughed really loud .
Jake paid no mind to what the lady had just said to him , he patiently
grabbed one pant . " How much is this one ? " He grins .
Amanda ( the front desk lady ) blew a bubble after taking the pencil
out of her mouth . " It will be twenty - five big ones . " She stuck her
hand out.
Jake took his wallet out of his pocket and paid the lady , he then
left the store .
" Hello ! John's plumbing . How may I help you ? "
" Hey Susan , it's me Steffanie . I was just wondering what you are
doing tonight ? "
" For what ? So you can hook me up with a total loser like the last
guy ? "
Last edited by lammy on Sun Aug 12, 2007 10:58 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Bah hum bug!!!!
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lammy
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by lammy » Mon Jul 30, 2007 4:29 pm
" No ! I promise this time will be different " , says Steffanie while sitting
down at McDonalds with Roland , Ross , Mike and Tim .
Susan laughs . " If you lie to me - you will be the one cleaning toilets ...
and unclogging pipes ! "
" Trust me Susan this guy is hot ... infact , I would date him in a
heartbeat . " Grins Steffanie at the guys while telling Susan this .
Roland busted out laughing and almost choked .
" Are you okay sweety ? "
" I am okay . I almost choked on this here french fry after hearing
what you said . "
" So will you go ? please - For me Susan . " Steffanie crossed
her fingers .
Susan takes a few seconds to answer steffanie then says , " but if he
is as ugly as the last guy you hooked me up with - you will owe me big
time ... are you listening Steffanie " , shouts Susan throu the phone .
" Yeah , yeah ... loud and clear ! "
" What time will you guys come get me ? "
" About eight thirty . Sounds good to you ? "
" Sure ! I have to go , I have a customer - see you then . " Susan
hung up the phone .
Steffanie smiled at the guys .
" So I take it that she said yes " , asked Ross .
" Ofcourse she did . It's on tonight guys . " Grins Steffanie .
Bah hum bug!!!!
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lammy
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by lammy » Tue Jul 31, 2007 9:24 pm
Jake was close to his apartment when from outside he could hear his
phone ringing . He took his time opening the door while waiting for the
phone to stop ringing but the phone kept on ringing . Jake sat down on
his front steps for a while until the phone stopped ringing and after ten
minutes of ringing Jake decided to go in his apartment . As Jake opened
his apartment door the phone stopped ringing only for the answering
machine to pick up .
" Hi Jake ! I know you are not home from work yet but I have the best
of news for you ... I am going to come visit you this weekend . Please
call me back when you receive this message . I hope everything is okay
darling . Love you sweety ... take care . "
Jake lowered his head entering his apartment after hearing his
mother's message . " Great ! Just great . " Jake threw his keys on a night
stand in the livingroom . " I am not going to call her for what ? " Before
Jake went into his room , he hoped that he would make a good
impression on his date . He dropped the dress pant on the floor and
jumps into his bed falling asleep fast . He dreamed of a girl that looked
like a model with blue eyes , blonde hair and soft skin . Jake saw himself
dancing and laughing the night away under the night sky with the woman .
He caressed her hair . Jake went to kiss her and was awakend from
someone knocking on the door . Jake arose from his bed . The person
kept on banging on the door like if the building was on fire . " Hold on ! I
am coming .who is it ? "
" Are you ready boss ? "
Jake opened the door . " Ready ? But it is not eight o'clock yet " ,
says Jake rubbing his eyes . Jake looked at his watch and it said eight
o'clock .
Steffanie rolled her eyes at him .
" Holy Jesus ! Okay - okay . I am going now ... just give me a few
minutes while I get dressed real quick . "
Bah hum bug!!!!
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lammy
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by lammy » Thu Aug 02, 2007 2:23 am
" Can you hurry up though , cause we have a lot of things to do before
we go on the boat ride . " Grins Steffanie .
" Just give me a few minutes will ya . " Jake had not eaten , showered
or picked out the clothes he would be wearing for tonight . " I hate being
rushed . " He closed the door .
Steffanie ran down the stairs and jumped into Rolands car .
" So is he ready ? "
" No . I have no idea what he was doing but he said he'll be right down . "
" Great " , whispered Roland .
" Just relax sweety ... for what we are going to do to him he can take his
time . " Laughs Steffanie .
Jake grabbed the dress pant that he bought today and tried it on ;
he pulled the pant all the way to his chest .
Belly layed in his mouse bed and covered his eyes with his paw .
"What's the matter ? You don't like it huh ? "
Belly knodded his head side to side meaowing .
Jake didn't know what to do . He looks in the mirror while Roland is
honking his horn .
" Let's go slow poke " , screamed Roland .
Jake let out a big sigh . He hurried out the house and almost tripped
with his untied dress shoes .
Bah hum bug!!!!
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lammy
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by lammy » Fri Aug 03, 2007 5:29 am
" Boss ! Over here " , shouts Steffanie .
Roland , Steffanie , Ross and Tim laughed really loud . Jake walked
towards the car with confidence that he would conquer his date .
Jake smiles . " Hi guys . "
Everyone in the car still laughed . Steffanie opened the
door for Jake .
" Get in boss" , says Roland .
Jake entered the car . They took off . While in the car Ross and
Tim where staring at Jakes shoes , socks , dress pant and t-shirt as they
both began laughing again .
" Can you please tell me what is so funny ? " Jake frowns .
Ross and Tim smiled at Jake .
Ross says , " yeah - at your pock-a-dotted socks with your pointy
shoes and your stripped dress pant . Where did you shop at ... cows are
us ? "
Ross laughed harder than the rest in the car .
" Alright guys - can you please calm your nerves " , shouts Roland .
" So where is Jim and Mike ? "
Steffanie looks back at Jake. " Oh gosh , we totally forgot about Jim ...
I am sorry boss , maybe next time . And Mike couldn't make it . "
smiled Steffanie .
" Oh " , says Jake fixing his eye wear .
Steffanie turns around to face the front of the car . " So are you ready
for your hot date ? " Grins Steffanie then turns to Roland and winks at
him .
" I have never been more ready in my life . " Smiles Jake combing
his hair with his hands . " She's going to love this handsome beast . "
Snorts Jake .
Bah hum bug!!!!
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lammy
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by lammy » Sat Aug 04, 2007 6:30 am
" Ha , ha , ha . " Laughs Ross .
Tim stuck his finger down his throat .
Steffanie turns around in her seat and smacks Ross on the forhead .
" Ouch " , he says .
" You are an idiot Ross . " Sighs Steffanie .
" Dude - stop the vehicle " , shouts Ross pointing at a liquor store.
" There ... we must bring lots of liquor boss . " Ross looks at Jake .
"Please go in there and rob the place . " Laughs Ross .
Roland stops the car.
Jake looks at Ross then says , " I most certainly am not a thief ! "
Ross looks at Jake .
" He's just messing around boss " , says Roland .
" Yeah - just messing around " , says Ross rolling his eyes . " Seriously
though , we need boos and lots of it . So will you please go in there and
purchase them ? "
Jake stares at everyone in the car as there was silence .
Steffanie's phone rings . " Hello . Oh hi Susan , how are you ? What -
how come ? Wait a minute " , says Steffanie to Susan . She turns to
Jake . " Boss can you please go on - we are going to be late . "
Jake exhaled really deep . " Okay let me out . " Jake exits the
car and while walking to the liquor store he whispered under his breath ,
" what a bunch of alcoholics " .
Bah hum bug!!!!
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lammy
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by lammy » Mon Aug 06, 2007 4:52 am
" So Susan , are you still going to join us tonight ? "
" Sure I am . Are you guys on your way ? "
" We are at the liquor store but we will be right there ... see you soon . "
Steffanie hung up the phone .
" I hope she is blind " , saiys Ross laughing hysterically .
Roland honked the horn .
Jake was in the store trying to figure out what he would be buying . He
is not a drinker and knew nothing about alcohol . Jake goes to the front
counter .
" Can I help you with something " , asked the clerk behind the register .
" Yes . I would like some alcohol " , says Jake seriously .
The clerk laughs at him . " Look around man- nothing but alcohol . "
Jake hears Roland honking the horn and the others screaming to
hurry up . Jake fixes his eye wear then says , " well in that case give me
the strongest alcoholic beverages you have . " Smiles Jake nervously .
" Would you like one of everything on this shelf ? "
" Yeah , yeah ... one of everything you got that can knock out an
elephant . " He snorts with laughter .
Bah hum bug!!!!
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lammy
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by lammy » Tue Aug 07, 2007 2:47 pm
The clerk looks at Jake weird . " Okay then , what ever you say
dude . " The clerk puts bottle after bottle in big brown bags .
After the clerk fills two brown bags to the top with liquor hard liquor
Jake says , " okay I think that should be enough " . He grins . " So how
much will that be ? "
The clerk coughs . " Two hundred and sixty eight dollars . "
" What " , shouts Jake . " Crap ! They can forget about their christmas
bonus this year . " He laughs . Jake hands the man his credit card . Jake
picked up the bags and almost dropped them on the floor . " Holy Molly ,
these bags are really heavy and I really don't feel like spending anymore
money on them animals " , says Jake walking towards the store's exit
door .
The man saw Jake having a hard time with the bags and shouts ,
" do you need help sir ? "
" No ! I'm fine " , shouts Jake walking out .
Roland saw Jake coming towards the car and pressed the button that
unlocked the trunk .
Ross stuck his head out the window and said , " thanx boss for the
boos " . He smiled .
Jake rolled his eyes at all of them and quickly dropped the bags in
the trunk .
" Oops , there goes the boos " , says Tim to Ross .
Ross gave Tim a dirty look .
Jake wiped the sweat of his forhead . " Phew ... what I have to do
just for one night of fun . " Jake then closes the trunk .
Bah hum bug!!!!
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lammy
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by lammy » Wed Aug 08, 2007 5:29 pm
Steffanie opens the door and lets Jake inside the car .
" Okay let's go " , says Steffanie .
" Woo hoo " , says Roland .
They took off to get Susan .
On the way to picking up Susan Tim wanted to know what Jake had
brought for them to drink . " What did you buy for us boss ? " Grins Tim .
" Alcohol . "
Ross smiles but Tim was not smiling at all .
" Dude , seriously ... what did you purchase for us tonight ? "
Jake looks at him then says , " does it really make a difference ...
alcohol does the same effect as beer " , shouts Jake .
Tim almost jumps on Jake . " You are lucky you are not alone . I
just wanted to know just incase I was allergic to the alcohol . " Laughs
Tim . " Let go off me dude " , shouts Tim to Ross .
Ross held him down so he didn't jump on Jake .
Jake grins . " Yes I am lucky ... specially tonight " , says Jake to
Tim raising the eyebrows up and down .
" Guys , guys " , shouts Steffanie . She then whistles . " Hello guys !
Calm the f*ck down - will you ! "
Jake did not say a word to Tim in the ten minutes it took Roland to drive
to Susan's house . All in the car was quiet .
" Hey boss we are here " , says Steffanie . She looks back at Jake .
" Aren't you excited boss ? " She grins .
" I'm actually nervous . " His legs shook , his hands were
sweaty and his eyes opened and closed uncontrollably .
" Yo boss , what are you doing ? " Laughs Ross .
Bah hum bug!!!!
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lammy
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by lammy » Thu Aug 09, 2007 3:33 pm
" What is wrong with you dude ? Have you never had a woman ? "
Laughed Tim .
" Could you two shut your hole already " , shouted Steffanie .
Steffanie opened the car door to let Jake out so he could go greet his
date .
Roland honks the horn .
Jake did not move an inch .
Steffanie got out and pulls on Jake out of the car by his hand .
" Come on boss - she is waiting for you ! "
" Let her wait " , says Jake still in the car nervously shaking
his legs .
" Or you come out the nice way , or you come out the bad way " ,
says Steffanie looking at Ross and Tim and whispered to them to push
him out of the car .
" Hey what the ? "
Ross and Tim pushed him out and he landed on the ground .
" I am trying to help you out here " , says Steffanie and helps him
up from the ground .
Jake looks at the guys and gives them a dirty look . Jake then fixes
himself up and dust himself off .
" Now boss go walk/run your behind to the door and greet your date -
she is waiting for you " , says Steffanie upset .
" But ... but ... what do I say ? "
Steffanie shoved Jake . " Just go ... go - go ! " She entered the car
and shuts the door .
Jake tried to get back into the car but it was locked . " Fine ! "
Tim and Ross were pointing at Jake laughing at him .
Bah hum bug!!!!
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lammy
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by lammy » Sat Aug 11, 2007 4:04 am
Jake fixed himself up one last time before he began walking to Susan's
front door . He started doing some kind of walk and ended up tripping
over his untied shoe and lands on a bush .
Steffanie covered her eyes then said , " Oh my God - Susan is going to
kill me " .
Jake picked himself up , he removed a branch that was in his hair
and grabbed his eye wear that had landed on the floor and with dirt and all
he placed them back on his face . He then cleaned himself off and began
walking towards the door . When he got to the front of the door he
cleared his throat as he did that the door slowly opened . A tall girl comes
from behind the door . Jake looks at her from the feet up . She's wearing
white high heels , a mini skirt and a tank top shirt . Her hair blew in the
wind . Jake was speechless .
Susan looks at Jake and rolls her eyes . " Great ! I knew not to trust
Steffanie " , she said upset .
Jake began to say hello when she started walking away . He quickly
followed behind her . " Hey there ! I am Jake your date " , shouts
Jake walking behind her .
" Yes - just great " , she adds walking straight towards Rolands car .
Bah hum bug!!!!
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lammy
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by lammy » Sat Aug 11, 2007 4:46 pm
" Oh no here comes Susan " , says Steffanie ducking down in the car .
"Steffanie you are so dead ! "
Steffanie gets out off the vehicle and pulls Susan to the side .
" Wow Steffanie - you really know how to pick them . " Smiles Jake .
" Yo boss ... get in " , screamed Roland .
" But I haven't even introduced myself yet . "
" Just get in ! "
Jake got in the car while Susan and Steffanie kept talking .
" Thanx again ! You know you really are messed up ... am I really that
ugly ? "
" Susan he is really not that bad " , said Steffanie and they both
looked at Jake .
" My dog looks better than him " , says Susan .
They both started laughing .
" So where am I supposed to sit down ? "
Steffanie smiles . " Umm ... on his lap . "
" Steffanie - Yuk " , shouts Susan .
" I know , I am sorry ... just this last time . I promise I will not ask for
another favor for as long as I am alive . " Grins Steffanie .
" Fine . "
Roland honks the horn and shouts , " okay - let's go " .
" Hey guys , I think she likes me " , says Jake to the guys
smiling away .
Bah hum bug!!!!
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lammy
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by lammy » Mon Aug 13, 2007 4:14 am
Ross busted out laughing . " Sure she does . " He laughed some more .
" Boss - Susan is going to be sitting on your lap " , says Steffanie .
" Yeah , so whatever you do, please don't drool on me and do not
touch me . "
Jake swallowed his saliva and everyone heard him . " Yeah , yeah that
is cool " . Jake began sweating .
Susan sat on his lap and they headed to the dock . All the way to the
dock Ross and Tim were staring at Susan while Jake was looking up at
the car's ceiling . Tim reached over Ross and touched Susan's hair but
since Susan was to busy speaking with Steffanie she did not notice , so
Tim touched her hair again and this time Susan felt her hair being
played with , she turned around and smacked Jake on the side of
his head .
" Didn't I tell you not to touch me " , shouts Susan .
" What ? I didn't do anything ! "
Tim giggled .
Jake hears Tim giggleling . " I don't know what is so funny Tim . "
" Dude , you are too hilarious " , answers Tim .
" I'll show you hilarious when I fire your behind . "
Tim laughed harder. " You fire me ... after tonight we all will be
unemployeed . " Smiles Tim .
Bah hum bug!!!!
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lammy
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