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My Dad's on life support, how do I help my mom?

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Postby fluffy » Sun Apr 23, 2006 9:36 pm

lol..........that's a compliment though........lol.........would you have wanted his grubby fingers down your knickers back then anyhow??.........lol.......

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Postby quirky » Sun Apr 23, 2006 9:48 pm

Indeed.

But I'd totally play doctor with Jim. :D
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Postby fluffy » Sun Apr 23, 2006 9:50 pm

lol........yeah we could all be his naughty nurses...........lol..and of course the nurses do what the Dr tells them..........lol......

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Postby quirky » Sun Apr 23, 2006 10:32 pm

Oh no.....we've just kinkified my Sunday!
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Postby fluffy » Sun Apr 23, 2006 10:50 pm

lol....glad to have been of service...... :wink: ..........you can rely on Fluffy to spice things up........ :wink: :lol:

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Postby quirky » Sun Apr 23, 2006 10:51 pm

Oh, I can spice things up....I just focus THAT energy on other things.
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Postby wonderbunny » Sun Apr 23, 2006 10:53 pm

You know, my dad was always so full of life. My soccer coach, softball, dance recital attendee, homework coach etc. We clashed in accounting He was a Controller (Accounting specialist) for a major silicon company and I never could get through that course. Family joke now. Today, we held hands. Tears... and he said he was scared. I whispered I know. With all the tubes, medication, bandaids as his skin is so thin you can barely touch him without causing him to bleed. I kissed him, and said Goodbye. He went to sleep. Maybe he'll be there tomarrow. Why is it so hard to say, I"m scared?
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Postby quirky » Sun Apr 23, 2006 10:56 pm

wonderbunny wrote:You know, my dad was always so full of life. My soccer coach, softball, dance recital attendee, homework coach etc. We clashed in accounting He was a Controller (Accounting specialist) for a major silicon company and I never could get through that course. Family joke now. Today, we held hands. Tears... and he said he was scared. I whispered I know. With all the tubes, medication, bandaids as his skin is so thin you can barely touch him without causing him to bleed. I kissed him, and said Goodbye. He went to sleep. Maybe he'll be there tomarrow. Why is it so hard to say, I"m scared?


If you PM me your phone number, I'd love to talk to you...on my dime.
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Postby Clemmy » Sun Apr 23, 2006 11:34 pm

Wonderbunny,

I am very sorry to hear about your dad. I hope you get enough strength to go through this situation, for yourself and for your mom... and it's ok to say that you are scared... anyone in your shoes would be... the roles have shifted... you fall into the position of providing support for those who have been supporting you your whole life... it's really scary. I am glad though that Quirky is around... she has been in similar situation and she is offering a hell of advice and support...! Take it please...

My prayers are with you and your dad... and God bless you Quirky...!
"Friend is a second self." -- Aristotle
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Postby quirky » Mon Apr 24, 2006 12:37 am

Erin? I'm here. A friend is coming over, but I'll check back all night honey.

Sometimes we just need to talk and we need someone to say....dammit...I've been there and I care. My deceased father noticed that the park in our town had the capacity to close itself off and raise the water level of the stream running through. He used his connections (old friends in a fascinating project) to donate 300 trout in different sizes.

The town jumped on board....the bass masters and others donated items....but it was just COOL to see and help all the kids as they enjoyed the fishing derby. For two years, my dad and brother cleaned all the fish for the kids.

Even posthumously, my father was never really recognized for this even though it was totally his doing. I'll bet the town has the derby to this day.

Whatever errors my father might have made, I think about how much fun those kids were having and I smile.
Last edited by quirky on Tue Apr 25, 2006 3:30 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby quirky » Mon Apr 24, 2006 12:40 am

You know, my dad was always so full of life.


I'm so sorry, because I know exactly where you are. Just keep talking to your dad. Talk to him as long as you can. Tell him you love him.

I'm serious about the phone number Erin.
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Postby MandyCarrey » Mon Apr 24, 2006 4:10 pm

Im sorry to hear that wonderbunny.I also understand a lot what your going through and i know it doesnt sound like alot but like everyone has said just keep strong... bless ya.
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Just be there for Him...

Postby Canadian Jayne » Mon Apr 24, 2006 4:30 pm

I know my greatest regret when my mom passed was that none of her family were with her. The Care home phoned me and said she was about to pass away and to get there as soon as possible, I was only a few
blocks from her place, when I got there she had passed. I could see
a tear on her cheek and I cried for hours at her bedside.
Wonderbunny, appreciate what time you do have with him.
Before my father passed away, my ex huband said we wouldn't be up before he died, I said how do you know. His father has died of Cancer and I guess he knew that it was going to happen soon. I wanted to
be there beside him, but I was nursing the baby and had three others to
take care of.
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Postby wonderbunny » Mon Apr 24, 2006 4:52 pm

I sense there are a lot of nurses who are attached to this website. I always thought it was an admirable job. I met a lot who have job burnout, so I'm a little jaded. PS I'm terrified of hospitals. So you'll have to excuse me if seem cold. I've been doing medcal malpractice for too long. I know people make mistakes, but when you know they are doing it and no one listens to you it can really play a number on your faith in human goodness. I mean when 15 doctors can't read a blood test, its time to get a new hospital. Sorry Charlie, tricks are for kids, and poppy seeds do not cause false positives on drug tests. Duh, only dopeheads actually believe that stuff. Brain damage.
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