Jim Carrey Online

Your entries are so much better than mine. Carrey on.

He had plenty of other pets as he called then usally blondes, brunettes and redheads all of which were happy being at his side not really needing him but wanting him........."OK Mutt" If your going to stay here for awhile you need to clean up you act to the bathtub you go..............Huhhh what shall I call you?.................

He scooped up the little furry body into his strong arms.....he was was surprised at how light she felt.....
Her little body began to relax....she was tired of struggling and this stranger felt safe....gently she snuggled his head against his neck..... ..
Jim felt a flea jump onto his head......... ........'terrific he thought...a flea ridden film star'........he chuckled to himself at the headline........(perhaps he was human after all................. )

He had decided to bathe Poochy in the sink ...........filling it with warm water he added bubble bath.........the sweet aromatic smell of vanilla filled the air.........' you're going to be edible by the time i've finished with you' he chuckled to himself..........
Poochy sniffed the water.........was she expected to go into that???.....she was more of a cinnamon dog she thought....spicy yet sweet .... .....................
Testing the temperature with his elbow like a new father, Jim concluded he was ready...........he scooped up Poochy into his arms then laid her gently into the warm bubbles...................
Poochy knew struggle was futile.......this strong man usually got what he wanted.......she relaxed as he gently poured water onto her fur and gently massaged the little bones.........it felt nice.......
Reaching for the shampoo Jim looked at the litle dog........alien in the plush suroundings and yet she looked as though she belonged...........
He poured a little line of shampoo down her back and began to froth the mixture........gently he started rubbing her head and placing his two hands together gave the little dog a mohican.........'gee, you are a cutey' he thought.........perhaps his initial impressions were wrong........
The little eyes gazed up at his and without warning a big pink tongue licked his nose..........Jim was taken a-back but secretly he liked it..........Poochy had given him a thankyou kiss, for little more than a bath...........how many genuine kisses had he had that day???......
Reaching for a fluffy towel he scooped up the little mutt and wrapped her in it.......he rubbed and ruffled the little dog who yelped with fun and delight........the dirty brown fur had turned to a dark golden and her little face revealed younger eyes.........Jim was surprised, he thought she was 'past it'...........but the sparkle of youth was still there..............
Wrapped in the towel, he took her outside to dry in the Californian sun......but unexpectedly he was greeted by the throaty jealous growls of his other dogs..........he'd need to watch them around the little dog.........

Lying back in the sun with the furry little body on his lap he began to think of a name for her...............she seemed friendly, undemanding, mysterious.....obviously intelligent..........HHHmmm................Poochy!!!.............the nickname had stuck..........the litle dog was to be called Poochy....and somehow it suited her.........
relaxed in the sun Jim and Poochy dozed off together, they both had made a new friend..........


Fluffy

as he was dozing he began to think back to the time he left his families celery farm, tried his hand at dounut making (could'nt get the holes correct) then he deceided to live life ....take a chance and sing Opera where he was discovered and became an overnight singing sensation. He used to have a dog back then named Woof and hey shared many a times together .............untill he ran away............funny how things change so quickly............

Woof had been his companion back then...The scruffy little hound had been his constant in an ever changing world....
To Woof he was everything...the canine had had a simple start in life.....
But to Jim, Woof was an undemanding friend.........who loved him unconditionally......how he had missed that........
Recalling his meteoric rise to fame Jim thought of his little companion...
where was Woof now?........It had seemed like an ever increasing stream of pedigree hounds had tried to muscle in, since those simple days............beautiful manicured visual perfection.......surely prize winners, certainly 'Crufts' contenders..........and about as hollow as those donuts.............some of them did make good bodyguards though and they eyed the little mutt with jealous mistrust........Their throats emitting soft menacing growls.......who was the newcomer?..........what the hell did she think she was doing there?.......
The newly awakened Jim eyed them carefully......he'd need to watch them........a newcomer in the fold, especially one who had made an impression was vulnerable.......

At that point Poochy (who was dreaming of hunting Rabbits)..kicked out her little back legs and gave a yelp.........
Amused by this, Jim looked down at the little body smiled and began to tickle her behind the ears..........
He sighed to himself........there was no denying it.....this one could help him get over Woof.............he always was a sucker for an underdog..... especially one that smelt of vanilla........

Fluffy

(anyone reading this)......ok Poochy time to go. The dog cathcher seemed like a nice enough fellow...........you would have to be to be in that line of work putting helpless animals in homes or worse the gas chamber......well maybe he wasn't nice ..........he had a well pressed uniform but even though it appeared clean it still smelt like animal...........which could explain Poochy's growling...........he picked up the dog and began out the door..............

The little dog began to tremble.......this stranger smelt of death......and why was he putting a rope around her neck??..........Something was very very wrong...........
She began to cry......little yelping cries.....pleading with her friend anything had to better than this...........But to her dismay he turned his back and slowly walked up to the house........'gotta go, Mutt' he said under his breath.......'i'm sorry'..........

She wriggled and thrashed about in the big mans arms........' Settle down you stupid beast' he shouted........'or i'll wrap this bloody lead round your throat now!'..........Suddenly Poochy saw her chance......she had wriggled herself out of his arms and was dangling by the rope......reaching forward she found her face hard against the mans groin........this was it!!...her one and only chance for escape.........sinking her little teeth into his testicles the man screamed in agony, dropping the rope and fell to his knees.............
Poochy ran..........ran as fast as her little legs could carry her.......past the pool, past the flower beds, past the gate......onto the road........!!!!!!!

BANG!!!she never saw it coming..........in her blind panic to escape death she found herself closer than she had ever been before.....The car stopped and an affluent young man got out to see what he'd hit........"it's only a bloody dog' he told his glamourous companion.. 'did it dent the car'? she enquired.........'No, thank god.....bloody dogs'.........this was not an animal lover...........
Hearing the commotion Jim went to investigate.......there, kicked to the side of the road, was the little bloody lifeless body of Poochy......
'awe maaan!..........what a mess....why did you run away you silly mutt?'.........bending down to touch the little body he stroked the soft fur......At that moment her little head lifted as if to say help....and small whimpering sounds came from her throat..........
'awe Jeez........i better get you to the vet'................'he said whilst bundling up the small dog into his shirt, he then ran to the car...................

At the vet the prognosis wasn't good.........Poochy had 2 broken back legs.......and some deep cuts..........she'd lost a lot of blood.........
There were some choices to make...........Put Poochy to sleep or fight to keep her alive...................?
What a choice to make?................with intensive care and attention she'd make it but he'd have to take her home........could he be bothered with a sick dog?.............Or would he give the word to have her destroyed.............For a moment he realised just what it meant to play God...............
He needed time out to think............bumming a cigarrette off a nurse he paced the hospital grounds....perhaps he could take her home and have one of his staff look after her....................yep...........that's what he'd do..................explaining his plans to the vets he drove into town, he'd be back, but boy! did he need a coffee fix...........

Later back at the vets he was presented with the sad sleepy little mutt......both back legs in plaster.......He cradled her like a baby and gently laid her on his back seat............'gee this is going to be harder than i thought'.....he mutterred softly........but the scared dog once more presented him with her pink warm tongue........she was greatful, of that there was no doubt.............

Fluffy

Poor Fluffy ..............Ya know what !!!! ............as soon as you get better little dog were going to blow this hospital and have some fun .................Life's to short..................we'll go to the pet store, the park,oh yea baby life can be sweet............as he left the vets he realized sharing fun is what makes things fun..................and he needed some fun.Everyone around him seems to be so serious...........new and better things were out there and he would find them with his new unconditional friend............he opened the doors and stepped out..........................

Poochy slept all the way back to the house.........a deep untroubled sleep, she was in safe hands for the first time in ages( but it might have been the anaesthetic wearing off.. .).
Arriving at the house Jim lifted the little dog into his expectant arms..she was just the right size to be 'Carreyed' around he chuckled to himself....
His Scottish housekeeper was waiting for them......'och jeeze, the puir wee dug'.........she exclaimed, reaching out for Poochy with her hands...' 'Whit an affa mess thon car made o' ye'.....Cradling Poochy to her bosom, Poochy started to awaken fully.......this lady smelt of fish and chicken,and Poochers was one hungry mutt!...........she started to whine and lick at the womans rough hands.....
'och the wee dug's surely hungry..........let's get some grub fer ye'...so Poochy was taken to the kitchen.....
Mary the housekeeper had prepared some steamed fish and chicken in expectation of the newcomer......2 small bowls lay on the counter...
Sitting with Poochy on his knee Jim began tearing off bits of the meat and presented her with a still warm strip of chicken.....
Her little nose twitched, her little tongue flicked out, to check whether or not this was indeed real ,and not just a cruel dream,........tasting the chicken she was in no doubt..........and in one swift movement removed it from his hands........she was in culinary heaven and Jim was her saint..........oh how she enjoyed it.........
After the meal the little dog was taken through to the sitting room, a blanket wrapped around her to keep her feeling cozy and safe and she closed her eyes.......and began to dream happy dreams.....

The next morning Mary and Jim faced a dilema.....how were they going to look after the invalid?.......Firstly Mary 'toileted' Poochy which was easy enough........poochy was taken to the garden whilst Mary held up her back legs and subsequently got a bit wet for her trouble,' next time i'll wear ma Marigolds(rubber gloves)' she thought.......
However getting Poochy around was going to be difficult.......the wee dog couldn't be just abandoned somewhere in the house........she would get so lonely she'd cry......plus there were the other dogs to worry about.......no, Poochy needed to be with someone all the time, and the only one who appeared to have a gap in his schedule was Jim.....
'Ok Poochers.....' we're going shopping!' he exclaimed.................
Pulling up in front of the maternity store was always going to attract attention to such a big star, but even more with a scruffy little dog in plaster.....'i need a papoose' he stated to an assistant........'one big enough for this mutt'.......The assistant hurried away, Jim was aware of some strange looks from the other customers, 'we have this leather and sheepskin one' she said nervously, Jim had that effect on women ...
'perfect, but you'll need to help me get her in it'........so after paying for the little contraption, Poochy was harnessed into it ...her little nose pressed against Jims chest, her little legs dangling down.......
As he began to exit the shop he became aware of the expressions on the faces of the female customers.........From curious nosiness, they had switched to humorous curiosity, then lustful adoration........Poochy was a star in her little harness..........the women flocked around...'how cute' they universally chanted.... 'look at those poor little legs'......'i wonder if she has tickly feet'?..........Chatting to these women Jim became aware that Poochy could probably be the best babe magnet EVER..........

'Poochy', he thought,' welcome to the family'

fluffy

Aware of the attention he was beginning to attract, Jim decided perhaps a walk along the beach was in order, and once Poochy was safely belted into the passenger seat he made the short journey to the coast.....Poochy by this time was getting fed up.....she couldn't see anything except the interior of the car......normally she liked to put her little paws on the dash and look for the Malibu 'talent'.......pedigree Mutts being walked by pedigee mutts she thought to herself.....
Once the car came to a halt Jim grabbed the papoose and strapped it to his chest.......This would surely impress all the bikini clad babes........
And, as expected a couple of girls, giggling hysterically, and shoving each other, as if to throw one another into the lions den, sauntered over...
A few awkward moments passed until Jim broke the ice with 'how you doing' and a smile.....
One of the girls immediately began waxing lyrical about loving his work etc but the other just stood transfixed..........
'That baby has awfully hairy legs' she exclaimed.........Poochy wasn't amused, 100 degree temperatures , her face flat up against Jims sweating body and now someone was laughing at her!...
Jim chuckled.......and turned so she could see the grumpy little mutt...
'oh how cute' she gushed...........a little dog....with plaster casts on it's legs......Both girls melted into the baby talk reserved for all baby creatures..........
A hand went in to pat Poochy..........'Grrrr' Poochy thought....i'm roasting,grumpy, hungry and i need a pee..........'leave me alone'.....
Jim was quite taken with their attention towards his little friend.....'do you want to hold her' he said to the primary 'gusher'......'wow , yes please'.....and into her open arms a sweaty grumpy dog was placed....
Holding Poochy the girl began dancing aroung, swinging from hight to low, round and round...........'awe jeez, put me down.....i feel terrible' the dog thought.........
'hey you're really good with Poochy, a real natural, i bet you're good with kids...right?'....Jim said hopefully......'why don't you give me your number , perhaps we can go out sometime'.........At this point the girl went crazy with Poochy, trying to impress Jim........round and round they whirled.............'slow down' said her friend, i'm not sure the dog likes it.........'awe, you're just jealous she called out' ...... As Jim placed his hand on the girls shoulder there was a sudden and high pitched squeal from her throat ....

"Maaaaaan... I"M GOOD!!!!!!' ....Jim thought to himself....' no problems babe we can ...........

"oh my god, your bloody dog has just peed down my Versace kaftan'.........sure enough Poochy had chosen that moment to 'go'........
At that point the girl took her hand sharply down over Poochys face stunning her.......she started to whimper..........
Grabbing the papoose and little dog, Jim turned to the girl and said 'no, i don't want the number of anyone who can be mean to a little animal, especially when it's hurt.'......clearly, the girl was vain and shallow despite her beauty.......
Pulling Poochy from the papoose he cradled her like a baby and stroked her head........
The little dog snuggled into his safe arms........'Poochy , poochy , poochy.......what am i going to do with you?' he chuckled softly to himself........................His little friend began to snore........

fluffy

He got home after stopping the let the mutt pee again................and realized that grumpy old dogs will never change...........they require constant attention and praise..........he was tired of grouchy people and sure wasn't going to put up with misbehavior from a dog ............so in the morning he would let her free to her own grievences..........if attention is what she sought then she would be better off with someone more suited....a lonley old man or hyper child...........................or.................

He looked at the sleeping little animal and said out loud "someone give a logical reason to keep this little doggy.........................can anyone hear me...............speak..............I need a reason"..............

think about it you've caught the peoples attention they feel sorry for the underdog and anxiously waiting to see what comes next..........suspense.

think about it you've caught the peoples attention they feel sorry for the underdog and anxiously waiting to see what comes next..........suspense.

Ahhh..............so it was deliberate then( )......my mistake

He looked at the sleeping little animal and said out loud "someone give a logical reason to keep this little doggy.........................can anyone hear me...............speak..............I need a reason"..............

because this little doggy has reached out , embraced the flaws and still gazes into those brown eyes.......(such is the lot of a masochistic doggy ).......she was sent ....., trust in it...................

If you take a chance through the writing, she may help you to understand something........................

but most of all, it's fun........


fluffy

Poochy snored happily in the afternoon sun. She'd made a little bed for herself on the grass, shaded by the frong, of a huge Californian Palm..
The sun warmed her little bones, and a cool breeze kept the air fresh......she dreamt of kindness, hope, love.............................and chicken! .................
The little dog wasn't the usual Californian pedigree mutt but she certainly had guts....there was no denying that......

fluffy